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SPEAK SOFTLY...BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED A BIG STICK --

Veterans' Advocate Jim Strickland with advice on how

to "speak" when dealing with the VA.

Veterans' Advocate Jim Strickland provides regular columns for VA Watchdog dot Org.

If you would like to contact Jim about his columns, you can email him here...

The archive of Jim's articles is here...

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Combat (defined): Combat, or fighting, is purposeful, violent conflict intended to establish dominance over the opposition.

Army Basic Combat Training includes basic and advanced rifle marksmanship, the bayonet assault course, field training exercises, individual tactical techniques, and mission oriented protective postures (Gas Mask, Chemical-Protective Over garment, etc.)

There was the Nuclear, Biological, Chemical (NBC) training...this includes a prolonged exposure to a “riot control agent” in a controlled setting. That would be a thick cloud of tear gas in a tightly enclosed space for the uninitiated. My first memory of that experience was the drill sergeant in that Quonset hut on Sand Hill who seemed to thrive on the stuff. Ft. Benning drill sergeants don't breathe like humans do and their skin is made of thick oiled leather. The only other memory I have from that day is puking. I didn't know I could vomit so violently and survive.

There were the night infiltration courses where we soldiers-in-training learned to move in the pitch black night while exposed to the lights and sounds of violent explosions and live fire. Think; crawling through slime under barbed wire while live rounds from machine guns are fired inches over your butt.

That night I understood what the meaning of “terrified” was. And that was just a game.

Soldiers learn to shoot, move and communicate as a team under battlefield conditions. Even if we don't learn to love each other, we do learn that we must depend on the other guy to stay alive. Basic is where our bond as Brothers and Sisters in arms began. We were becoming part of America's most exclusive club, we were the Veterans of the future.

If one hasn't experienced this initiation, one is never a member of our club.

We have intense physical training. We experience live hand grenade tossing. We're practiced in bayonet assaulting. We know that to THRUST the bayonet and LIFT the bayonet all while TWISTING the bayonet is to inflict a painful and immediate death on our foe. We learn that if we can't shoot you or blow you to pieces from a distance, we can and will disembowel you with surgical precision. Mayhem and maiming become second nature in Basic Training.

We can show you all about claymore mine tripping or how to quietly choke a man to death. Later in the day we'll take a little recreation by beating each other senseless during pugil stick training.

If you were in the Marine Corps or Army, you learned about all that stuff along with plenty of rough and tumble hand to hand fighting. If you wore the uniform of an Airman or a Sailor, you probably experienced less of that face-to-face killing technique but instead you learned how to toss thousands of tons of ordinance at the enemy from 3 miles overhead or maybe 300 miles at sea.

The Marines and Sailors learned how to be shoved into deep water wearing boots and 55 pounds of gear strapped to them and swim to survive. It made the technique of waterboarding an enemy combatant look like a day at an exclusive spa.

Killing people. Blowing stuff up. It's what the military does.

I gave my stepson a small pin as he went off to basic training. It said, “Join The Army. Travel To Exotic Locations. Meet Strange People. Kill Them”. I'm not sure his mom ever understood what we thought was funny about that.

(My stepson just returned from 16 months in Iraq. He's fine. He's contemplating reenlisting. He is a soldier. I've never been more proud!)

Killing. It's what we trained for. We aren't the police trying to serve and protect. We aren't teachers or politicians or builders or ambassadors. We're warriors. We were and are the most professional and best equipped group of skilled killers ever to walk the earth. Every other country on the planet is panic-stricken by the American military man and woman.

Is it any wonder every civilian you meet at your VA health care facility is scared to death of you?

Months ago I was talking with a young VA hospital police officer. The VA hospital police aren't rent-a-cops like they are at some CBOCs or at their civilian counterparts, they're the real deal. The VA decided long ago that because of the volatile nature of the population they serve, they had best be prepared for what may walk in their doors. The officer explained to me that when they are trained and oriented to their new jobs at VA, they're told that almost every Veteran they meet is as well or even better trained in weaponry and tactics than the police are.

They're instructed that every Vet is potentially lethal and many of the Veterans walking the halls in the facility have taken the lives of other human beings.

I see the same Veteran every time I walk into any VA health care facility. He's the guy who is seething about some issue he's having with his VA. It may be real or it may be imagined but whatever it is, he's really angry. His temper is short, he's loud and getting louder and he could care less that anyone may be offended by the steady stream of expletives that flow so naturally out of his mouth.

Most other Veterans ignore him. We've seen it all before and in a way, we understand why he's in such a rage. We aren't going to interfere with him, he's our brother.

But those civilian employees don't understand it. It frightens them. Worse yet, it teaches them to use that blank stare we see in the VA facilities. They don't acknowledge us and they refuse to make small talk with us because they're afraid that any moment any one of us will go off on them too. They learn that to keep us at a distance is a mechanism for survival in their jobs.

If you're a regular reader, you already know I often get up on my soap box and I preach that we must be courteous to a fault.

Whether in our direct verbal communications, our body language or when we write to our VARO, showing respect and leaving our emotions behind will get us to our goals a lot quicker than trying to bully our way through.

If you yell at a young civilian employee or you allow the anger and frustration in your heart to become outwardly visible, if you curse at your doctor and stalk out of a clinic, it's all noted so that other employees can protect themselves from you.

I opened my mailbag earlier today and had this from an old friend...a reader who writes to me often;

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Jim...Just got an eye opener! Requested my medical records from a 6 month period last year in order to check on a VA decision based on 2 visits to my PCP. A week after requesting I got a 1 inch package for the period in question. It not only had the visits to my PCP, but also all the visits to the counselor I see monthly. the psychiatrist I see yearly for antidepressant meds, every phone call and visit that I had made to the local VA outpatient clinic. I was surprised when I found that on a visit to my PCP to complain that the default settings of the VistA system had impacted the decision on a request for an increase in ratings for documented worsening neuropathy, it was recorded that I was "unhappy and very upset" that the PCP's notes had caused me to be turned down.

I remember discussing the program with him and he was going to make a note that he had not performed the checks necessary to make the determinations that VA had used to make their decision. there was nothing about his not having performed any medical checks. I was then surprised that when I had fallen and broken my hand that my request for information on reimbursement of hospital bills had turned into a 'request for fee based services'.

Then suddenly I am being diagnosed as possibly being bi-polar. Then there was the entry that 'even though being housebound, he just returned from a trip to Disneyworld.' (An interesting aspect of the Disneyworld comment is that whomever had enough access to my records to see that I receive A&A, did not investigate further to see that I receive it for my spouse who has a cardiac condition.)

Apparently being irritated because medications prescribed by private MD are not available from VA turns into 'patient verbally upset and demanding'.

I have an appointment Friday to see my PCP, I plan on asking for a return referral to the ophthalmologist (our clinic doesn't have one) who diagnosed me as having glaucoma and needing to be rechecked every 6 months, a referral for physical therapy for adhesive capsulitis (I have a Rx from my orthopedist), a referral for a neurologist for my ABI results (have the test results), a request to go back on Avandia as the new meds are not providing the control I need for blood sugar.

I hope to do this in a polite, quiet and reasonable manner so as to not get another negative comment in my records. Who would have thought that trying water aerobics would turn into 'quite motivated over the last few months'.

I have learned that every comment to every employee at the outpatient clinic is potentially recorded from the employees viewpoint. What may be a reasonable comment by you may be considered an emotional outburst by the employee. I know they are hard working individuals who get more than their share of irate comments, but I can't believe the record of the comments and mannerisms that are attributed to me as defined in the records.

I have no doubt that my good natured and unimposing manner when asking for guidance contributes to the recipient taking umbrage at my tone or mannerisms.

Keep up the good columns, I enjoy reading them, plus it is heartening to know that some vets are making inroads into the VA system.

*********************************

My reader's tongue-in-cheek comment to his “good natured and unimposing manner” is telling. We emailed later to discuss whether maybe there was some truth to the comments made in his record. We even considered the remote possibility that he might come across as more aggressive and demanding than he thinks he does.

I hear that about myself. I think I'm being a sweetheart of the first order and later my loving bride will tell me I seemed angry and that I was pushy about something as we shopped or had lunch. I hear that I came across as demanding, even unreasonable!

She counsels me that while she understands that I'm just being me, not everyone is used to my gravelly voice, direct stare and furrowed brow.

I've had readers ask why I use a picture where I'm not smiling? I don't quite know how to explain that I am smiling in my VA Watchdog photo...I was in a positively jolly mood when that was taken.

The lesson to be learned here is that we are often our own worst enemy. I rarely feel any tension when I'm working with another Veteran. We speak the same language. We share similar experiences and we understand the non-verbal communications.

The civilian employee of any part of the Veterans Administration doesn't feel that way. They haven't walked in our shoes, they aren't part of our club and they've been warned of our potential for aggressive, loud, maybe violent behavior.

When we walk in to a clinic or hospital for treatment, it's our duty to remember who we are. If we're smart, we'll leave our aggressive nature at home and become acutely aware of the effect our presence has on those we interact with.

This same message applies when you write to your VARO. I say “write” because I rarely suggest that you call. Calling almost always leads to misinformation, faxing leads to lost faxes and emails are hopeless. The only way you can be sure you're getting your message to your VARO is to write it down and send it via registered mail.

When you write to the VARO, include the relevant information, state your issues briefly and to the point and end it as soon as you can. Don't write to tell the VBA how you feel about their services. They all already know that there isn't a Veteran in America who is happy with what they do. Every employee at VBA is acutely aware that they do a poor job of servicing their only customers. That's old news to them and repeating it isn't going to change anything.

Displaying your attitude is a waste of your time. Winning should be your only thought. It's your choice. If your goal is to get good treatment or win that disability award, don't be a jerk. Get smart.

Knowing that the employee you're dealing with anticipates that you're going to be confrontational and abusive, surprise him or her. Show them you're friendly, intelligent and that you appreciate how hard they work for you. Smile. Look them in the eye. Be charming.

Yes, I said charming. It isn't that painful, I do it myself.

This puts them off balance and confuses them. Then, suddenly...it's your game and you're much more likely to “establish dominance over the opposition”.

Think of it this way; when you deal with your VA, unlike combat, you can speak softly...because you don't need a big stick.

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Larry Scott  --

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